Thanks again for your attendance and participation at our discussion this week on Modules 4 & 5 of the Love and Logic class. As mentioned, we are going to rely on the blog this time to do a lot of our communicating and discussing due to our lack of time on Wednesday. Please reflect on and respond to the following three prompts:
1) Please reread Reading 5.2, "When Multiple Students Misbehave at Once." This was one of my favorite readings in the class and one in which I made a major mistake two years ago (I'll share in the comments below). Please refelct on this reading, including any experience you've had with a situation like this and if you agree or disagree with the steps they recommend in dealing with this issue.
2) Module 4 is one of my favorite parts of the Love and Logic concept. I appreciate how they address the fact that one or two students can ruin the learning environment for the rest of the class, and as a teacher or parent this is not acceptable. Please reflect on our discussions related to Recovery and Time Out and post your thoughts, including how you feel you could use the recovery process in your classroom.
3) Finally, when we next meet on December 1, we will look at Module 6, "Setting Limits with Enforceable Statements." In preparation, please list one or two things you've done in the past that has been successful in communicating with students without that communication leading to a power struggle.
Two years ago at the beginning of semester two I could sense that I needed to intervene or it was going to be a long semester with one particular group of students. I decided that I was going to choose one of the students and intervene. I reaffirmed with this student how I thought he was a leader and how he was being brought down by other students in the class, and that I was hoping he would be a leader and remove himself from the negative situation. I also contacted his father and reinforced these same things. I was actually pretty happy with myself.
ReplyDeleteIt was a disaster. I found out that this student was indeed not a leader and went right to the other students, told them I had said they were bad influences on him, the next day was one of the worst of my teaching career. I don't think one of the students has still forgotten about it.
Looking back over the years, my first year of teaching was by far my most challenging. There were three major leaders in my classes that caused major issues and how I handled them made it worst.
ReplyDeleteI had a particular girl, *Lexi. She's never had to do homework in the past and always received A's never having to work. IF she didn't understand a concept immediately she would get edgy and wanted the entire class to stop so she could get her caught up. She wouldn't always get her homework done so on those days, going over homework was atrocious. She would go off on tangents how "I never helped or answered questions," blah, blah, blah.
It wasn't until after I had her that I realized what I did wrong- I battled her. I never was able to go back to change the relationship but it was a great learning experience. Now when I have that sort of student in my head I'm thinking "I need to charm her." Then my life will be easy.
Life lesson: battling anyone in front of others is the worst thing you can do. They will do what it takes to save face.
A few years back, I had a very challenging group of students. I was a little nervous to start the year, but as things would have it, it was the best year. I would take this group back anyday. There was one student who definitley was looked to as the leader. He made an impact on the class. I noticed this right away. I also noticed that this student didn't hear many positive comments about himself. So, after giving this student many positive comments, I pulled him aside and talked about his leadership qualities-how he can be a positive leader or a negative leader-but I told him I see him as a positive leader. I told him I respected him and his opinions and I could tell others in our class did as well. He embraced this. I really think it helped him to hear something positive. After this talk, things went really well with the class and our relationship.
ReplyDelete2. I have had and continue to have students who need recovery time in my class. Sending them out was the worst thing for them. If I allowed them the time-whether it was few minutes or 45 minutes in class to regain their thoughts, they typically were able to come around and particiapte again. Sometimes, it wasn't until the next day that they came around. But if they were not disrupting the learning of others by just sitting there, I was fine with that. They knew that I understood what they needed to recover. Sometimes, too, it was better for them to take a short break to the bathroom or to get a drink. Their recovery time plan was something we worked out together.
3. I ask a lot of questions.
1. As I reflect on this, one mistake I have made in the past when there are multiple students acting up, is to lecture to the whole class about the misbehavior. I have found it to be much more effective to talk only with the acting out students either in small group or individually away from the rest of the group. If I am unable to talk with them during class, I will tell them quietly to stay after class. The longer I teach the less I depend on group consequences. I really try to keep the momentum going with the students that are doing what I expect and give them the majority of my time. When I was feeling burnt out, I realized that I was focusing in on the negative behaviors and dealing them in the large group setting instead of removing them if needed and focusing in on the lesson. I cannot believe how much further I get with difficult students when I address their misbehavior in a private manner and not allow it to distract from my teaching.
ReplyDelete2. As I have mentioned before, I rely on a "recovery time" only when students are disrupting the learning environment for others. If a student is not doing anything, I allow the natural consequences take over. But when a student is disruptive and/or disrespectful I think it they need to be removed to keep the environment a safe and quiet place for students to learn. I like having the "recovery room" as a buffer before sending to the office. It has been my experience that once I introduced the "recovery time" I had a lot of testing and resisting. However, I was persistent and talked with student, parents, and admin about the procedures and now it is almost a non-issue.
3. When I feel a power struggle brewing, I walk away from the student. I stop talking to them because I know I will regret what will come out of my mouth when I am angry. I actually will visualize tape or hands covering my mouth so that I will not say anything. I sometimes bite my lips. If needed, I will be calling the office to remove the student.
1) One thing I have really worked on this year is trying to separate the behavior issues from the class in general. Sometimes i find myself making blanket statemetns to the class about behavior or effort, when really it is only a few kids who need to hear these reminders. I like treating the individual incidents both positive and not so positive
ReplyDelete2) I love the concept of a recovery or time out area..the problem is of course logistics. I am very fortunate to be able to team teach and this allows me some flexibility. I also like the concept that kids get a chance to regroup and think thru their actions and are then able to reenter the class with no repercussions. It is a win win situation.
3) I am very excited to hear of some suggestions in this area....I can remember countless times my mother grounded me until I was 35 when I was young and remember thinking how ridiculous that was. Sometimes I do feel that we as educators dont have many more options with students...so I an anxious to hear this part.
1)Fortunately, I have had only limited experience in having to deal with multiple misbehavers in the same class. The one situation where it did occur was eventually brought under control by, as Love and Logic suggests, strengthening relationships with group leaders and using their “pull” with peers to help keep the environment controlled. However, rather than forge an explicit alliance with the obvious group leader, I tried to channel the potential in some of his more dedicated followers- and orchestrate a subtle change in the leadership dynamics. Unlike Love and Logic’s suggestion, I started with the two most compliant among the group of four. I acknowledged that participating in misbehavior instigated by the leader was appealing, but also emphasized appreciation for the times when they did behave appropriately. Having someone validate their “good” choices and tell them they could be positive leaders for their peer rather than negative followers of him was really motivating for these two students. The other students pretty readily accepted that they could and would hold each other responsible for maintaining order in the classroom. They also became more self-aware of their own behavior, and more willing to control it. Of course, initially the former leader tried to maintain his position, and some of his misbehaviors increased for a couple days! However, he quickly figured out that his peers were not going to join with him any more; and misbehavior lost its appeal when no one was doing it with him. He eventually realized that the way to regain his status among the peers was to take back more of a leadership role- but now with a focus on getting others to show positive and appropriate behavior rather than act out. He became one of the most conscientious and diligent enforcers of classroom expectations for the remainder of the year.
ReplyDelete2) In-room Recovery time is one of the tools for maintaining the learning environment that is most readily available to me. All the classrooms in which I teach have plenty of empty seats, or adjacent, but still sufficiently separated, areas where students having a hard time “getting or keeping it together” can be relocated for awhile. Students who do end up changing seats are able to overhear instruction and discussions- which gives them a better idea of what they are missing (and what they will have to make up when they return). Finally, students clearly know that they are “on the ladder” of consequences when they are asked to relocate- and that the next step will be a more severe removal farther from the classroom.
ReplyDelete3) “Community” and “Choice” are key concepts on which I place emphasis when communicating limits but avoiding power struggles with students. I use the words “we” and "our" rather than "I" and "my" to reinforce the idea of Community. I try to get across that it’s not just me as a teacher dictating expectations- that peers, school rules/administration, workplace relations and basic human decency influence what is and isn’t acceptable in our classroom. “We” also reminds kids there is accountability for behavior to others besides me in the classroom. I sometimes specifically ask, “Could you do that when you have a job and still keep it?” when addressing behavior or attitude problems. When students misbehave or don’t meet expectations, I first ask “what do you think will happen if you continue to. . .?”; and then, if that doesn’t work , I remind them, “if you (x), then you will need to (y).” I finish the reminder with a comment that acknowledges their power to choose: “It’s your choice,” “I trust you to make a good choice,” “Choose what you think is best for you.” Another phrase that is helpful is “I’m not yelling, I’m just telling”- as in I am not necessarily personally offended by a student’s misbehavior nor particularly motivated to get them in trouble, but I am simply informing them by restating the expectations on behalf of the entire classroom community.
ReplyDeleteIf it is my first time talking with particular student, I will usually skip any references to leaders. I would use some of the phrases we have discussed in previous models and see how they respond. For example I would speak with one of the students individually and say: I noticed that there you are doing a bit of talking during this time, and I know you might be trying to help but I want to make sure that it doesn’t get distracting for the rest of the class. That usually works at least for a while and my talks with the student will get more stern and would include consequences if our talks became continuous.
ReplyDeleteI think if there was a way to make recovery time work logistically in the band room I would be for it. However, once class gets going the students are all spread out around me and it would be difficult to make that an option for the student without making a scene for the rest of the class.
I haven’t had many problems with power struggles but if I feel it might get to that I will delay our conversation until a little later when I have had time to think of what I am going to say, and there is no one else around. If it is just the student and myself they do not have an audience to feel like they have won or lost anything.